You know that feeling when you step out of the shower and your bathroom floor basically becomes a death trap? Yeah, I lived that reality for about eighteen months when I first moved into my flat. I’d picked these absolutely gorgeous porcelain tiles – proper expensive ones that looked incredible in the showroom – but the moment any water hit them, it was like trying to navigate an ice rink. In a bathroom that’s barely bigger than a cupboard, there’s nowhere to grab onto when you start sliding.
The thing about small bathrooms is every single decision you make gets magnified. That flooring choice you think looks amazing when you see a tiny sample suddenly becomes this massive presence when it’s the main thing you’re looking at in a cramped space. I’ve made pretty much every mistake possible with bathroom flooring over the years, partly through my own poor judgment and partly through helping mates sort out their places, and I reckon I can save you from going through the same disasters I did.
My current bathroom floor is luxury vinyl planks in what they called “weathered oak” – sounds a bit pretentious but it actually looks brilliant. Cost me about £180 for the materials, and I spent a weekend fitting it myself while my girlfriend went to stay at her mum’s because apparently my swearing gets quite creative when I’m struggling with measurements. Saved probably £300 on installation costs, and honestly the installation wasn’t that difficult once I got the hang of cutting the planks properly. Three years on and it still looks as good as when I put it down, which is more than I can say for basically anything else I’ve attempted to install.
The clever bit is how I laid it – ran the planks lengthways down the bathroom, which makes the whole space look longer than it actually is. It’s one of those optical tricks that actually works, unlike half the stuff you read about online. My bathroom is probably about four metres long but feels more spacious because your eye follows the lines of the planks.
When I first moved in, the previous owner had installed these tiny mosaic tiles everywhere. You know the type – thousands of little squares with grout lines that seemed specifically designed to trap soap scum and go grey within about a fortnight. Cleaning day meant getting on my hands and knees with an old toothbrush, scrubbing away like some sort of demented cleaner, and even then it never looked properly clean. In a small bathroom, everything shows, so high-maintenance flooring becomes your absolute nemesis pretty quickly.
The slippery factor is massive when you haven’t got room to recover if you lose your footing. My neighbour upstairs – Sarah, lovely woman but questionable DIY judgment – installed polished concrete in her ensuite last year. Looks absolutely stunning, proper magazine-worthy, but she ended up putting rubber bath mats everywhere because getting out the shower was like attempting to ice skate. Kind of defeats the point of having beautiful flooring if you’re covering it up with ugly mats, doesn’t it?
Here’s what I’ve learned actually works in small bathrooms: textured vinyl is genuinely brilliant. Not the horrible stuff from the 80s that looked like someone had printed a pattern on plastic – the modern versions are properly impressive. Water-resistant in a way that means you can actually relax about splashes instead of frantically wiping up every drop, and it costs about a quarter of what you’d pay for natural stone. I went for one with subtle texture – not so bumpy it’s impossible to clean, but enough grip that I’m not doing my morning ice-dancing routine.
Sheet vinyl gets a bad reputation, but the newer versions are surprisingly decent. My sister put it in her ensuite – and I mean tiny, you literally have to shut the door to reach the sink properly – and chose this design that looks like expensive marble. Eighteen months later, it’s holding up brilliantly despite daily abuse from her two teenage boys, who seem incapable of showering without flooding the entire floor. The trick is getting the edges sealed properly with silicone, which took us about an hour but means no water’s getting underneath to cause problems later.
Ceramic tiles can work if you’re smart about your choices. Large format tiles – I’m talking 60x60cm or bigger – mean fewer grout lines, which translates to less scrubbing and a cleaner look in a cramped space. Helped my mate Dave retile his bathroom using these massive porcelain planks, about 60x120cm in a concrete finish, and the transformation was incredible. Made the room look twice the size, and cleaning went from being an all-day nightmare to a quick wipe over.
Grout colour matters way more than you’d expect. White grout looks crisp for about five minutes, then shows every bit of discolouration from soap, shampoo, and general bathroom grime. I always tell people to go a shade darker than their tiles – hides the inevitable staining and looks intentional rather than like you can’t keep your bathroom clean. Nobody wants to be judged on their grout maintenance skills.
Natural stone sounds luxurious but it’s honestly high maintenance in a small bathroom where every water droplet shows. Polished marble looks amazing until you realize you can see every single splash mark, and darker stones like slate can make a small space feel like you’re showering in a cave. If you’re determined to go the stone route, honed finishes are much more forgiving than polished ones – they hide water marks and give you better grip underfoot.
One trick I picked up from watching too many YouTube videos during lockdown: if you’re dealing with a really tiny bathroom, consider running your flooring material up the wall about ten centimeters as a sort of baseboard. Creates this seamless look that makes everything feel more cohesive and gets rid of that awkward junction where floor meets wall. Did this with my vinyl planks and it’s one of those details that people notice without quite knowing why the room looks more finished and expensive than it actually was.
Money-wise, luxury vinyl typically costs £15-30 per square meter, ceramic tiles run anywhere from £20-60 per square meter plus installation, and sheet vinyl can be as cheap as £8-15 per square meter. For a small bathroom – say 12 square meters or less – the difference between budget and mid-range options might only be £150-200, but the difference in how they perform day-to-day is massive. Sometimes spending that extra bit upfront saves you hours of maintenance later.
The biggest mistake I see people make, including myself initially, is choosing flooring purely on how it looks in perfect showroom conditions without thinking about daily reality. That gorgeous natural stone might photograph beautifully for Instagram, but if you’re constantly stressed about water marks and weekly deep cleans, you won’t actually enjoy using your bathroom. I’d much rather have flooring that looks decent and performs brilliantly than something stunning that becomes a daily source of irritation.
My current setup has survived two years of morning coffee spills – long story involving trying to multitask while running late – several hair-dyeing experiments that went slightly wrong and left mysterious stains, and my girlfriend’s habit of somehow creating puddles after every shower despite the bath mat. It cleans up with normal floor cleaner, doesn’t show every footprint or water spot, and still looks like something you’d see in a proper design magazine rather than a teacher’s flat in Bristol. That’s the sweet spot you’re aiming for – nice enough to make you smile when you walk in, practical enough that maintenance doesn’t eat your entire weekend.
